Wednesday, October 04, 2006

A Top Ten List: Bush to Hastert

A top ten list, for phone calls/msgs from President Bush to Speaker of the House Denny Hastert.

#10. "Who came up with your public relations strategy for dealing with pedophiles on the staff? Have you been talking to the Pope again?"

#9. "Have you noticed Hillary has been kind of quiet? I hear Hugo Chavez hired away her speechwriter!"

#8. (a text msg): "LOL! luv ur Sgt Schultz bit on Foley: 'I no nothing!' ROTF!"

#7. "Hey, Denny: Why don't Republicans from Florida use bookmarks? They just bend the pages over! Don't you love that one? Denny, are you there, man?"

#6. "Cheer up, Denny! Our telephone polls are going to go 'way up, as soon as the citizens realize we are probably listening in!"

#5. "Hey, Denny, how about this one: Didja hear that Foley's seat is up for grabs? Wait, isn't that what got him in trouble in the first place? You aren't laughing, Denny! Man, this is great stuff, you gotta loosen up!"

#4. "Denny, how about we change G.O.P. to stand for 'Gay Orlando Pedophile'? Whaddya think?"

#3. "Tell ya what, let's just this die down. We can transfer Foley to a different parish, right?"

#2. "Now I know why you were so upset by the FBI raid on William Jefferson, Denny! You were afraid we might find Foley in his office with a couple of pages stuck together!"

And the number 1 message from President Bush to Speaker Hastert:

"Denny, you're doing a heckuva a job!"

2 comments:

Michelle said...

You do that all by yourself? You should write for Letterman.

political consulting firm said...

don't let michelle get you down. i thought it was funny.